Post by Rachel Plencner on Jan 28, 2012 23:55:34 GMT -5
Day #1: It smells like Herpes in here
Finally. After what feels like 87 years of casting calls, and 4 million weeks of waiting, I have made it, to the front of the Big Brother Recycled house.
Chenbot: "Houseguests. Look all around you. The person standing next to you, could be your new best friend, or, they could be your worst enemy. The 12 of you are about to embark on a 3 month power struggle for food, luxeries, and power! I will begin calling your names selected at random. The first four to enter the Big Brother House are, Libra, Russel, Karen, and Rachel. Please go inside!"
So we walk into the Big Brother house, and the first thing I notice is that the walls are really colorful! Like all Orangey! Then two seconds later I heard Libra scream, "I'm from Rice Fucking University" and my mood was killed. *Sigh* I just decided to run to the All Star room, and put my bag down there because 90 days from now I'll be walking out of this house as one!
So, 10 minutes later. After lots of weave pulling, bewbage falling out of dresses, and catfights over all of the beds, we all got to sit down on the sofa and introduce ourselves, I took this time to make readily accurate observations about the other 11 HG's.
April:
April was very... strange. The three words she spoke were like vomit flowing out of a faucet. She seemed very socially inept, and didn't say next to anything at all. I think she was banking on her boob job giving her instant friends but that's not how it works in Big Brother darling!
Cassandra:
Cassi is odd as well. She only giggles about everything and not much else. Her teeth look like someone peed on them. I'm already looking at two players who are socially inept! Yay! How the hell did these people make it to finals.
Drew:
Drewbie! I like Drew, he seems pretty cool. He's a man of few words, but better than th eother two dewbs I've gotten the chance to meet so far.
Jee:
Eww Chimmy Chong, Ding Dong, and Asian. I loved Jun in Big Brother Recycled 10. This fool cannot talk to me. I'll have to give him the don't talk to me hand. Just Kidding haha, Jee was really quiet, and decided to pretty much only whore around in the board instead of talking on AIM like normal people. His social ability probably resembles his sex life. He gets into the house but doesn't close the deal. Sad.
Josh:
Oh Josh, the first gay in the house. As long as he's nothing like Dustin i think we'll be ok. I learned Josh is an English major, and I hate English, but aside from that we get along fabulous. He's not a flaming homosexual, so that is a plus!
Kalia:
Oh NOOOO! It's Kalia Kong! Beware of the Kalia Kong! She will eat everything in the house and try to Dougie everyone into a coma! Kill me now! >_<
Karen:
Karen is augsome and inanimate at the same time. We can have uhmazing conversations about old 80's music, but outside of that, anything else you talk about her is the equivalent of talking to a lamp. It just awkwardly beams at you and gives you this shit grin smile. Not ok!
Libra:
Bitch? Bitchy? Bitchier? Bitchiest? Needs to get the fuck back to Rice Fucking University where she belongs. Nobody likes 30 year old mom ass in a house. Kthanx Libra!
Russel:
Well Russel is very quiet. I can already bank on him being a keneiving schemer in this house. He seems really nice and carefree on the outside but he's a cold blooded serial killer at heart.
Shelly:
Should I say Shelly v2? I know Shelly from another game, so this is going to be awkward! Not a fan of the momma bullshit. Just be a cougar like you're suppose to be! That will be more entertaining.
Tonya:
Damnit, here's the flirt of the house. I hope she doesn't go around spreading herpes like Jen did. And she too whores around in the board and doesn't get on AIM. Lamesauce.
~ Twist Reaction and HoH Reaction to come. Your Welcome Jun, your thread will be up a little bit after this.
Finally. After what feels like 87 years of casting calls, and 4 million weeks of waiting, I have made it, to the front of the Big Brother Recycled house.
Chenbot: "Houseguests. Look all around you. The person standing next to you, could be your new best friend, or, they could be your worst enemy. The 12 of you are about to embark on a 3 month power struggle for food, luxeries, and power! I will begin calling your names selected at random. The first four to enter the Big Brother House are, Libra, Russel, Karen, and Rachel. Please go inside!"
So we walk into the Big Brother house, and the first thing I notice is that the walls are really colorful! Like all Orangey! Then two seconds later I heard Libra scream, "I'm from Rice Fucking University" and my mood was killed. *Sigh* I just decided to run to the All Star room, and put my bag down there because 90 days from now I'll be walking out of this house as one!
So, 10 minutes later. After lots of weave pulling, bewbage falling out of dresses, and catfights over all of the beds, we all got to sit down on the sofa and introduce ourselves, I took this time to make readily accurate observations about the other 11 HG's.
April:
April was very... strange. The three words she spoke were like vomit flowing out of a faucet. She seemed very socially inept, and didn't say next to anything at all. I think she was banking on her boob job giving her instant friends but that's not how it works in Big Brother darling!
Cassandra:
Cassi is odd as well. She only giggles about everything and not much else. Her teeth look like someone peed on them. I'm already looking at two players who are socially inept! Yay! How the hell did these people make it to finals.
Drew:
Drewbie! I like Drew, he seems pretty cool. He's a man of few words, but better than th eother two dewbs I've gotten the chance to meet so far.
Jee:
Eww Chimmy Chong, Ding Dong, and Asian. I loved Jun in Big Brother Recycled 10. This fool cannot talk to me. I'll have to give him the don't talk to me hand. Just Kidding haha, Jee was really quiet, and decided to pretty much only whore around in the board instead of talking on AIM like normal people. His social ability probably resembles his sex life. He gets into the house but doesn't close the deal. Sad.
Josh:
Oh Josh, the first gay in the house. As long as he's nothing like Dustin i think we'll be ok. I learned Josh is an English major, and I hate English, but aside from that we get along fabulous. He's not a flaming homosexual, so that is a plus!
Kalia:
Oh NOOOO! It's Kalia Kong! Beware of the Kalia Kong! She will eat everything in the house and try to Dougie everyone into a coma! Kill me now! >_<
Karen:
Karen is augsome and inanimate at the same time. We can have uhmazing conversations about old 80's music, but outside of that, anything else you talk about her is the equivalent of talking to a lamp. It just awkwardly beams at you and gives you this shit grin smile. Not ok!
Libra:
Bitch? Bitchy? Bitchier? Bitchiest? Needs to get the fuck back to Rice Fucking University where she belongs. Nobody likes 30 year old mom ass in a house. Kthanx Libra!
Russel:
Well Russel is very quiet. I can already bank on him being a keneiving schemer in this house. He seems really nice and carefree on the outside but he's a cold blooded serial killer at heart.
Shelly:
Should I say Shelly v2? I know Shelly from another game, so this is going to be awkward! Not a fan of the momma bullshit. Just be a cougar like you're suppose to be! That will be more entertaining.
Tonya:
Damnit, here's the flirt of the house. I hope she doesn't go around spreading herpes like Jen did. And she too whores around in the board and doesn't get on AIM. Lamesauce.
~ Twist Reaction and HoH Reaction to come. Your Welcome Jun, your thread will be up a little bit after this.
